I Feel Like An Idiot

So my class reunion is tonight and I feel like an idiot! As an ENFJ, I have a tendency to care way too much about how others view me and I'm finding that I don't want to go to the reunion considering that I've gained fifty pounds since graduation and I used to be super skinny. Granted I have had two kids and I've had some issues losing it, but I'm still super nervous for no good reason! I didn't even like half the people I graduated with so I don't know why I'm freaking out so much inside. UGH. Sometimes I don't like being an ENFJ. Sometimes I wish I was like Josh, the INTJ, who doesn't give a damn about what other people think of him. He's working with me to stop caring so much but its a slow process and it's becoming a little agonizing.
To give myself credit, though, I have made little leaps toward total self acceptance. Hopefully it will come sooner rather than later. As for this evening, well, I'll just suffer through it and hope all goes well, although I'm not sure what could go wrong.

Oh well, here goes nothing.

Love, Mackenzie